Bianca Knight (Bianca), Mum-to-be of one

My recent activity

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  Bianca posted a Comment 29/11/2012

  Wow I'm so sorry Ebbymama about your loss... Also sorry to hear another of our girls are leaving us, much happiness for the future x

  Hi all.

  I've been juggling a lot of things lately, I've been working 2 jobs as income has become very little lately. I've started an online course. I also briefly met my daughter.
  At 32 weeks I would have sworn I was in labour, the doctor reassured me that everything was normal.
  And just a few days ago I lost my waters, contractions were so strong they were actually coming on top of each other. I called my midwife and made my way to the hospital. 5 minutes of being at the hospital Bella was out, but no cry. The doctors and nurses were running around and everyone was in panic mode. All I can remember thinking was that she was gone. They managed to clean her airways and she started crying, it was such a relief. They placed her on my chest and she looked up at me with big eyes, I was so in love. That night I woke up to go to the toilet and when I came back I looked at Izabella and sure enough... She was purple and had stopped breathing. I picked her up and was screaming for the nurse to come, they announced her dead barely 6 hours after birth.
  
  Rest in peace my little lady, you will forever be in my heart and I can't wait to be with you one day. I love you so much, words can't even explain.
  
  So without further ado... Goodbye Karimums. I've been here for so long, I think it's been 3 pregnancies now. I'm off the children bandwagon for now. The trauma from losing 3 children has scarred me too much to even begin to pick up the pieces yet. I won't be back for a while, if at all. You are all in my thoughts, though. I've loved my time at Karimums and every single one of you has made it what it is now, and you have made my pregnancy and worries so much easier, I cannot thank you ladies enough.
  I've noticed two of our managers have left us also... I was quite sad knowing that two of our girls had left, and to think I'm now doing the same thing!
  I wish all of you healthy and long lives for both you and your children.
  
  Please - all of you - cherish your children, always let them know how much you love them because one day they might just not be here.

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  Bianca posted a Comment 11/10/2012

  Thanks ladies! I agree, it is often best to follow your heart :) , can't wait to plan the wedding, probably going to be really stressful but my mum and sister are helping out - so that's good. I'll keep you guys updated on the baby planning as well!

  In love :)

  I'm just gunna rant, and tell my story!
  Me and Jeremy have been dating over a week, and as ridiculous as this sounds - we're in love. We said we'd take it really slow so neither of us get hurt ... but, we both confessed how deep our feelings are for each other. Jeremy confessed that he's loved me ever since he knew what love was.
  ... So... without further ado, I'M ENGAGED! Yep, happened today, actually. Me and Jeremy were talking about commitment yesterday, and I was telling him how I've never really lived my life and etc, then today he takes me and Christian to his place (which is amazing, I love his house!) and proposes :) I was a nervous wreck and broke down crying and couldn't stop saying yes (lol)
  I just can't imagine life without him... He's been my best friend for over 16 years and he's been there for me so much, I know what he's like on the inside and he's such an amazing man. Also, I'm turning 23 at the end of this year and I haven't even lived my life, I haven't ever just jumped at an opportunity and done things for the hell of it. The only amazing thing I've ever done was had Christian.
  Jeremy and I are going to get married in about 2 months and then start trying for another baby :) Considering his house is bigger and nicer, we're going to start packing up my things and move into his house, I know we haven't been dating long at all, but I really think he's the one!
  I haven't even told my family about this, so you guys are the first to know (because I know you ladies don't ever judge, and I really want to tell someone this, lol)

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  Bianca posted a Story 11/10/2012

  In love :)

  I'm just gunna rant, and tell my story!
  Me and Jeremy have been dating over a week, and as ridiculous as this sounds - we're in love. We said we'd take it really slow so neither of us get hurt ... but, we both confessed how deep our feelings are for each other. Jeremy confessed that he's loved me ever since he knew what love was.
  ... So... without further ado, I'M ENGAGED! Yep, happened today, actually. Me and Jeremy were talking about commitment yesterday, and I was telling him how I've never really lived my life and etc, then today he takes me and Christian to his place (which is amazing, I love his house!) and proposes :) I was a nervous wreck and broke down crying and couldn't stop saying yes (lol)
  I just can't imagine life without him... He's been my best friend for over 16 years and he's been there for me so much, I know what he's like on the inside and he's such an amazing man. Also, I'm turning 23 at the end of this year and I haven't even lived my life, I haven't ever just jumped at an opportunity and done things for the hell of it. The only amazing thing I've ever done was had Christian.
  Jeremy and I are going to get married in about 2 months and then start trying for another baby :) Considering his house is bigger and nicer, we're going to start packing up my things and move into his house, I know we haven't been dating long at all, but I really think he's the one!
  I haven't even told my family about this, so you guys are the first to know (because I know you ladies don't ever judge, and I really want to tell someone this, lol)

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  Bianca posted a Comment 11/10/2012

  Such a lovely story! Glad everything worked out so well. Goodluck for your wedding in a weeks time! You will look lovely. Thanks for sharing. x

  Me & My Family

  I just thought that it was my time to share my story =)
  I met Nathan when I was 14. He was new to the school after getting expelled from his previous school - Yes girlies, I was attracted to a Bad Boy :P
  Funny thing, he was my Best Friends' Boyfriend!! I was soo jealous of her. lol after a couple of months, they had a falling out and as the Bestie, I tried to get them back together but it just didnt work. After a week or two, nathan and I started dating, which of course didnt go well the Bestie. We had a falling out - she thinking i made them break up so I could have him - not true. But whatever, no longer Besties. We were together for about 10...11 months before we made the move to sleep together. I will be honest that I was scared, not about having the sex, but more so that he was gonna be one of those guys that left me after, or brag to all his friends. But he was nothing like that. No one knew till about 3 or 4 months after. LOL. about 6 months after our first time, I ended up pregnant with Robert, in yr 10. Of course S**t hit the fan with the parents but we stayed strong together. All my friends were very supportive, and of course I get the s**t from other kids at school, but Nathan stood up for me and once a couple of kids were mucking around and bumped into me (complete accident) and Nathan went all psycho at them about hurting the baby. Some of the "snobs" and other kids who never really talked to me, actually started being really nice and standing up for me too. It was nice =) . I had Robert in March of 2007. At the start of yr 11. I stayed in school as long as I could, and Mum watched Robert. When I couldnt, I got my friends to bring the homework home, and take it back to school for me. lol. they always were around morning and afternoon to see me and Robert. Nathan too of course. Eventually it got hard, missing out on Robert's milestones, so i left yr 11 and become a full time mum. I stayed home until the end of the year, as my friends were hitting into yr 12. I wanted to finish school. Not wanting to go back to highschool, and having my friends in a higher grade and me left alone =( I did a TAFE course called Adult Tertiary Program. Which once completed, I would of done Equivalent to yr 11 & 12. They wanted me to do it slowly over 2yrs, I did it 1 while Robert was at Daycare. and technically finished school along with my friends. I couldnt go to the school formal, so I made my own at a local resturant with my closest friends. I even had my own gown =) Nathan didnt get to finish highschool - he took his role as a Dad and got a full time job to support us instead. Nathan and I lived with his parents until our differences on parenting got in the way (Between his mother and I) so we got lucky, and rented a unit. All before Robert turned 1. When Robert was 2, we had Katie. And a bigger house by then! We struggled with the rent and bills, as we took a chance to send Nathan to TAFE for 6 mths, so he can get his Certificates he needed to be an Apprentice. Our parents helped us with the food shopping while we tried to get through without his main income. He got Centrelink payments, but it was still really tight. He passed - thank god! - and is now a 2nd yr Electrician. And we have Jason now =) He even managed to get his licence and a car - thanks to his Mummy - and now things are better. We are still a little tight on money, And cause we are paying for a wedding, but its worth it in the end once he is a Full Qualified Sparky. ! We have been together for 7years and It is now only 7 days till our Wedding day - and im happy. =) Im getting married to my best friend and My Highschool Sweetheart <3 <3 and my best friends from Highschool as my Bridesmaids.

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  Bianca posted a Question 8/10/2012

  Just some things...

  I want to change Christian's first and middle name. I guess because I myself, don't think the name suits him. And also because his Father picked it out for him, and honestly... I never liked it to begin with. It's too common, and I want him to have a "different" name. I already have one picked out for him, and have started to call him that about a month ago. Is it possible to change his name on his birth records?
  And... I have a, uh... Boyfriend? Sheesh, that word. Never thought I'd ever ever ever date someone again. But, hey, if you're in love, you're in love. We're taking it slow though. He knows that I've been hurt and he's been hurt too. Although, we do live together. He moved in with me when Iris first passed, and bought me flowers every day. We've been dating for a week now, I guess I was too ashamed to tell anyone. Seeing as my Fiance (now someone I despise, lol) left me a month ago. Anyway, his name is Jeremy and he turns 29 at the end of the year.
  Funny enough, my son looks so much like Jeremy it's not funny. We had a family day out and an old lady came up to Jeremy (whom was holding Christian) and said that they had the same features. Jeremy was happy by this, of course!
  Also, we want another baby - eventually. Jeremy doesn't have any kids of his own, and really wants one. And he knows I want another. For some reason I think I'm ready, but maybe I just want to fill the gap of when I lost my daughter. I think it's been about over 3 weeks since I lost her (sorry, my memory is horrible) of course, we wouldn't start planning right away. We still need time to get used to each other and being a "family", by the way me and Jeremy aren't complete strangers - I've known him for about 16 or so years. If we got the all clear from the doctor, in say, 2 months, then we'd start trying. We discussed all of this, and he's happy waiting as long as it takes to get pregnant. What do you guys think though? I'll be discussing it with my doctor when I actually get time to go in, but for now some advice from mums on here will do :)
  Also, my baby boy is 6 months old!! He turned 6 months yesterday... the time is just flying by now, I can't believe that he's half way to a year. To celebrate his 6 months of life, he had his very first solids and we had a nice day out at the park. He wobbled his way through the park (holding Jeremy's hands) and was so enthralled on all the birds and wild life. Then my mum and dad came and we had a barbecue and it was fuuuu-un!
  A few days ago my friend sent me a letter, apologizing profusely. She felt bad that she wasn't there when Liam had left. But, along with a note, was a picture of Iris. I was actually really glad that she'd taken a picture, I hadn't, didn't want to remember her that way... But, now that's been a month since losing her, I feel lucky that I have a picture of her.
  I think I covered everything, thanks in advance!

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  Bianca posted a Comment 28/09/2012

  I believe you can the oatmeal bath mix in the drug store? That's what I was told anyway, I actually got it from a friend, convenient. Goodluck with that though! Glad it's just itching and not anything serious, I'm sure you can cure it pretty quickly then.

  Itchy and dry skin- Suggestions?!

  Hey Mummies and Mummies to be!
  
  So I'm now a day away from the 14 week mark! Yay! Got all my scans and blood results back last week with awsome positives on every front- My doc says we're a text book example of perfect health so far!
  
  What I'm finding a lot in the last few weeks- particularly bad in recent days, is that I'm itching like crazy!
  
  I know for a fact that is simply as I'm a bit dried out ATM, depsite drinking heaps of water and moisurising where I can reach lol! I work fulltime in a air-conditioned office and know that's half the problem too.
  
  The hardest part is that I get really itchy on my back- where I can't easily reach to moisturise. My partener will put some on my back a few times a week- but I kind of feel like it needs to be morning and night to help me- something that I need to do when getting ready for work when he's not home etc!
  
  Has anyone else gone through this? If so, can you recommend a method or product to help! Is their an oil or something I can add to the bath water to give me an Ultra good soak, or something that works well on a back loofa in the shower? lol strange I know- but help!

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  Bianca posted a Comment 28/09/2012

  Yay, 14 weeks! Glad bub and yourself are nice and healthy. As for the itchy and dry skin, it usually disappears after having bub (although, I doubt you'd want to go through the whole pregnancy with this discomfort) I think you're itchy from your body changing and everything stretching and adapting to being to pregnant, if it is that then; avoid hot showers and baths because they can dry out your skin, use unscented soaps, and towel off lightly (don't go rubbing your skin, it can irritate it) have an occasional warm oatmeal bath, make sure to put moisturizer after your shower or bath and make sure it's unscented, if you can avoid going out when it's really hot and sunny, wear loose smooth cotton clothing (if you can) although if you're actually breaking out in rashes then go see your doc as you may need medication, if it's REALLY bad itching then you should tell your doctor or midwife because she can either figure out what's causing it or refer you to a dermatologist, some of these conditions can harm your baby (I'm not meaning to stress you) definitely see your doctor though!! It could be signs that something is wrong with your liver. I did most of this when I was pregnant with Christian (as I had really itchy skin) and after doing this each day it faded in time and after a few weeks I wasn't itchy at all. Goodluck! Definitely start trying some of these things now, and bring them into your every day routine, but you need to see a doctor :) keep us posted!

  Itchy and dry skin- Suggestions?!

  Hey Mummies and Mummies to be!
  
  So I'm now a day away from the 14 week mark! Yay! Got all my scans and blood results back last week with awsome positives on every front- My doc says we're a text book example of perfect health so far!
  
  What I'm finding a lot in the last few weeks- particularly bad in recent days, is that I'm itching like crazy!
  
  I know for a fact that is simply as I'm a bit dried out ATM, depsite drinking heaps of water and moisurising where I can reach lol! I work fulltime in a air-conditioned office and know that's half the problem too.
  
  The hardest part is that I get really itchy on my back- where I can't easily reach to moisturise. My partener will put some on my back a few times a week- but I kind of feel like it needs to be morning and night to help me- something that I need to do when getting ready for work when he's not home etc!
  
  Has anyone else gone through this? If so, can you recommend a method or product to help! Is their an oil or something I can add to the bath water to give me an Ultra good soak, or something that works well on a back loofa in the shower? lol strange I know- but help!

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  Bianca posted a Comment 28/09/2012

  Thanks mums! @AprilMum I'll try him on solids in the next 8 weeks then and just see how he goes. And it is pretty scary getting them ready for solids. And thanks for the info! I love those first teeth, can't wait till Christian gets his! @Tigger45 I definitely won't rush myself :) I think the main reason I want another baby is to try and get over the baby I lost. And I know, I should definitely start weaning him out of co-sleeping before trying again, I definitely get where you coming from - you're definitely not sounding rude or pushy :) thanks for the info! It definitely helped.

  Just an update.

  It's been over 2 weeks since I lost my little girl, ghee A LOT has changed since then. I got my period less then a week after losing her (not something I was looking forward too), I've been thinking of becoming a Mum of two, in other words, trying again. I think I'm physically ready to be a new mum again, to be a single mum of two. But mentally? No. I don't think I'm mentally ready to try for a child, I don't think I'm mentally ready to (IF it were to happen again) lose another baby, it would just break me. I WANT another child, but just - not yet. Although I'm quite torn, what would you do in my situation?
  As for Christian, holy moley! He's just a big chubba bubba! He's about 2 weeks shy of 6 months! I can't believe that it's been almost half a year since I had him!? I can still vividly remember him as a new born and a part of me really misses that, and how everything was when he first entered the world. He has a checkup when he turns 6 months old, and I just KNOW he is going to be so huge and wow all the docs! He has stunning blue eyes. We're still breastfeeding, he's the BEST feeder! He has a feed as soon as he wakes up (which varies, usually 5am or so) then at 8 when we're both fully awake, then at lunch, and he usually has another small breastfeed after lunch then another after his bath and before bed, then sometimes wakes up for a feed at about 12 or 1 then feed him when he wakes in the morning, then continue that.
  He sleeps amazing, too! I've been co-sleeping him ever since he was a new born because he needed to be fed every half an hour and co-sleeping with him was the only way I could sleep. I still co-sleep him, he's only slept in his crib probably 3 times, and he sleeps horribly, he's up SO many times during the night and neither of us get sleep. But when we co-sleep it's sooo different, before bed we have a snuggle and I blow him raspberries and if I'm not too tired I'll sing him songs or read a book then he might have a 5 minute feed then we're both asleep. We've never had a problem with co-sleeping and I don't see us stopping anytime soon :D
  Also, when can I start him on solids? Some people have said 6 months, others have said I should have already started him on solids, but for me I want to be able to breastfeed him for as long as possible.
  When do babies first teeth start sprouting? I'm just curious is all.
  Thanks in advance and sorry about all the questions and stories.

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  Bianca posted a Comment 28/09/2012

  So cute! He reminds me of a little surfer dude with that tan, blue eyes and blonde hair! :P

  

  My little shark

  Just having fun dressing up!!!!

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  Bianca posted a Comment 28/09/2012

  Sooo cute! :)

  

  Park Fun

  Enjoying her first swing at the park.

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